I use NFP. Do you?

It amazes me when I talk to women, especially those trying to conceive, that so few know how to chart their cycles. The amount of information we can gain from charting our cycles is amazing! (watch for a follow up blog post on this) Charting your cycles can tell you when to have sex so as to get pregnant or avoid getting pregnant. It can alert you to when there may be fertility or even thyroid issues. Why are young women not being taught the beauty of their fertility and how to watch that fertility work cycle to cycle? This makes me rather upset. I certainly wish that I knew these things sooner, but now that I know what I do, I really hope I can help out other ladies as they learn about their bodies.
So what does it mean to chart your cycles? What does it look like? How much time does it take? Charting your cycles consists of watching for signs of ovulation throughout your cycle. You only ovulate once a cycle, so you can identify which day you ovulated to avoid or achieve pregnancy. The most important sign to watch in order to identify ovulation is cervical fluid. When I first started charting, this was the only sign I used. I later added temping (taking basal body temperature immediately after waking) and cervical position. Some women also choose to chart more subtle signs or use ovulation predictor kits in addition to their charts.
In the beginning charting can be confusing, but it is so worth it. Like I said, when I first started charting, I was only watching my cervical fluid. This is fairly simple, if you have a regular cycle. Throughout your cycle your body goes from having no vaginal discharge to maybe sticky or creamy to a very slippery almost egg-white like discharge. This egg-white discharge is fertile cervical fluid. This may happen for one to three days, then your body will return to having very little discharge until you reach your period and the cycle begins again. Now if you have PCOS you might experience patches of fluid. You may notice that you are slightly wet throughout your whole cycle. Every person is different and it's important to remember that your chart will likely look different from your neighbors.
Since I have PCOS my cervical fluid was very hard to understand. I was advised by my doctor to begin taking my temperature every morning as soon as I woke up. This is called basal body temperature. If you are ovulating, your temperature will generally begin low and stay low until ovulation. Once you ovulate (slippery egg-white cervical mucus time) your temperature will rise by about a degree. This indicates that you did ovulate and is caused by the increase in progesterone after ovulation. If you are not ovulating you will not see this increase.
You can also chart your cervical position. This is still a fertility sign that I struggle with observing. In order to observe this sign, you need to squat in a similar position at the same time everyday, then insert a finger into your vagina to feel for your cervix. Your cervix will be either high, low, or medium and firm, soft, or medium. You also observe how open it is. If you have had children, it may always feel slightly open. If you choose to chart this sign, you may want to check out the Beautiful Cervix Project at beautifulcervix.com
This is just the basics of charting your cycles. There are many other signs and signals that I will talk about in following blogs, but in the meantime if you want to learn more about charting your cycles I recommend you read the book Taking Charge of your Fertility by Toni Weschler. You can also look into taking NFP classes through your local Catholic diocese or checking out these websites: www.boma-usa.org or www.ccli.org
Know your body. Love your body. Serve your body.
Blessings!

It's A Love Story.

I am writing this blog as a way to cope with our fertility struggles, as well as make them purposeful. This is our story. It is true. It is happy and it is sad. I only hope that our story can help you with yours.

My name is Lisa. I attended The College of St. Scholastica in Duluth from 2008-2011. During that time, I lived with my boyfriend. When I graduated, I thought he was the guy I was going to marry, but in July of 2011 we had a horrible break up. (We have since forgiven each other and last talked to  each other on friendly terms.) After I broke up with him, I started dating another guy, but we really had nothing in common. It was during the time that I was dating this guy that I met my husband. In December of 2011, we went to a local bar for it's last ladies night before it closed. While my then boyfriend was talking to his friends I caught the sight of another guy from across the bar. He looked really familiar, but I just couldn't place him. Turns out he was thinking the same thing. Finally, he came over and sat down. "Did you go to Elk River High School?" he asked. I did. As soon as he started talking I realized who he was. I had taken a German class with him in high school. I said, "Yes, you're Eric right." He was. I added him as a friend on Facebook that night. I invited him to a number of parties at my boyfriend's house and really started to like him. I listened as he talked and found out that he was Catholic, which was something that I really wanted in a guy. He was fun to be around. We liked a lot of the same things.

One night my boyfriend and I got into an argument and I really thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I ended up breaking up with him. I started watching Eric's Facebook account. I was sad when I found out he had a girlfriend. I had broken up with my boyfriend mainly because I liked Eric. The weekend after I broke up with my boyfriend, I went to visit my parents. I continued to watch Eric's Facebook account, and noticed a post that he needed someone to talk to. I messaged him and asked how things were going. I gave him my phone number. He said he had talked to someone and figured it out. That night I decided to go out with my sister and cousin to listen to the band at the local bar. In between songs, I checked my Facebook. He had just posted that he was a free man! I was so excited that he was single that I bought the girls a round of drinks. I asked him about the post and we met up for dinner and cards the next night. The night ended with a hug and I was sure he wasn't interested in me. I was so disappointed, but I thought I would take one last chance and texted Eric. I told him that I had had fun that evening. He said he was glad and we should do it again soon. I was a little more hopeful, and when I got a text that Wednesday asking if I wanted to join him on a 5 hour road trip to Wisconsin to do some snowmobiling I jumped on the opportunity.

On the car ride, we talked about life. We talked about our past relationships, work, and what we wanted in the future. The whole car ride I was still unsure of whether he was interested in me or not. When we got to Wisconsin, we went right to the hotel. Eric reserved a room with 2 beds, but the hotel had made a mistake and only had a room with one bed. I said it wasn't a big deal. That night we met up with some of Eric's family at the bar and then spent the night at the hotel. Spring had come early and there wasn't enough snow to go snowmobiling so we decided to go out and do some target shooting instead. We headed over to his uncle's house. When we were there, his uncle was on the phone with another family member and he said, "I'm just sitting here with Eric and his girlfriend." I sent a quick look in Eric's direction, but didn't say anything. I didn't want to embarrass Eric and I wasn't sure what he had told his uncle. That night, when we got back to the hotel, we went to the hot tub. He told me that he really liked me and that he wanted to date me. I was so happy, and that started our relationship. A year later we went back to the same hotel, even the same room, and Eric proposed to me. We planned our wedding for December 28, 2013. We have been married almost a year now. There have been ups and downs (we will get into those in following posts), but it has been an amazing year and I look forward to many more.